


flowering

by Anonymous



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Anal Sex, Cunnilingus, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Orgy, Other, Sex Pollen, Vaginal Fingering, but it's still sex pollen so fair warning if that squicks you out, cad and jester don't participate, extremely handwavey sex pollen mechanics. i barely thought about it at all and neither should you, this is about as consensual as sex pollen gets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-24 10:47:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30071079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Beau leans back, spreads her arms over the sides of her chair. "Does this… Stand? Like. If we’re ever in that situation."There’s a pause, and then Caleb puts in, "I think it might be useful. If it does happen. To establish consent, or lack thereof, while we are in our right minds."
Relationships: Beauregard Lionett/Yasha, Beauregard Lionett/Yasha/Nott | Veth Brenatto/Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast/Fjord, Fjord/Mollymauk Tealeaf, Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast, Nott | Veth Brenatto/Mollymauk Tealeaf, Nott | Veth Brenatto/Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 8
Kudos: 90
Collections: Anonymous





	flowering

**Author's Note:**

> fill for [this prompt](https://criticalkink.dreamwidth.org/3194.html?thread=1637754#cmt1637754) on the kink meme, though I think I ended up going a bit off-script lmao. also, this is the first time i've checked every single Category box on a fic.
> 
> i wrote this in a couple hours and did NOT edit it but! enjoy anyway!

"Well, _I'm_ married," says Veth haughtily. _"I_ wouldn't _need_ to pick one of you greasy fuckers."

"Booo," says Beau. "It's a hypothetical, numbnuts. Say Yeza isn't here."

"Oh, and we just _hypothetically_ need to fuck each other-"

"There's pollen that does that, you know," Caduceus puts in.

"What, really?" says Fjord.

Caduceus nods. "They're usually used for fertility. Sometimes in rituals and such. But if you're around the flowers during allergy season, well, it can just happen."

"Huh." Fjord frowns. "And you just _have_ to have sex? Or you die?"

"Maybe die, maybe just feel pretty miserable for a while. They’re mostly tropical."

There is a moment in which they all think about how much time they’ve spent in the tropics.

The brief silence is interrupted by Beau saying, _"Sooo?_ Who would you pick, Veth?"

Veth narrows her eyes. "…You first."

"Aight." Beau leans back, spreads her arms over the sides of her chair. They’re gathered around a table in a tavern, with enough noise around them that she doesn’t feel _too_ observed, but, still. "Does this… Stand? Like. If we’re ever in that situation."

There’s a pause, and then Caleb puts in, "I think it might be useful. If it does happen. To establish consent, or lack thereof, while we are in our right minds." Sober nods and noises of agreement go around the table.

"Huh," says Beau thoughtfully, examining each of her friends in a new light. "I mean, if it’s bang or die, then, yeah, whatever, anyone who’s around. I trust all you fuckers not to hurt me, and I don’t want to kick the bucket, especially not while horny. But, like, if we’re talking preferences. Like, who should take point, so to speak." She points at each of them in turn as she speaks. "Molly… no."

"Hey, fuck you."

"Fuck you too. But, like, not. You probably wouldn’t shut up the whole time and I already want to strangle you often enough as is. Caleb… You can go down, but no dick."

"It’s what I prefer anyway," Caleb mumbles, "but I sincerely hope it does not come to that. I do not see you romantically."

 _"Christ,_ me neither, this is if I’m in trouble. Jester, yeah, but only if you want to. Fjord, no, no offense, you use Axe deodorant and I don’t like that about being in proximity to you. Veth, yeah-"

_"Me?"_

"Uh, yeah, why wouldn’t I?"

"Well, I - I’m just a housewife," Veth says, weakly.

"Cunt is cunt," says Beauregard Lionett, philosopher. "Besides, you’re a cool housewife. You have a gun. You steal shit. That’s hot." Veth actually seems to be _blushing a little bit,_ so Beau winks at her for good measure. "Anyways. Caduceus, I don’t think _you’d_ like that, so no." Caduceus nods fervent agreement. "Yasha, yes." Beau delivers those last two words with an intense casualness, making no eye contact whatsoever. "That’s me done."

Molly’s up next, and he leans back in his chair, stretches his arms over his head, smirks around the table. "You all should _wish."_

 _Ugh._ Beau jabs him in the side just to make him jump. "That’s such a fucking non-answer, Tealeaf, spit it out."

"It’s true," Molly purrs. He goes to loosen the strings on his shirtfront, which is already open nearly down to his bellybutton. "I congratulate everyone in advance-"

Beau punches him in the shoulder. "Can you quit being an exhibitionist for _five minutes-"_

"Absolutely not, dear. To answer the question - any. Or, maybe, excluding of course our firbolg friend, _all."_ His voice curls low and suggestive around that last word.

"You aren’t taking this seriously," Beau grumbles.

"I’m being completely serious," Molly tosses back. "Caleb."

_"What?!"_

"It’s your turn."

"Oh," says Caleb, weakly. "Ah. Erm… Beau, nein."

"Fucking rude," says Beau, though it’s just on principle. She doesn’t want Caleb’s dick anywhere near her, and she’s honestly kind of grateful he wouldn’t ask.

"Mollymauk-" Caleb stumbles for just a moment too long there, and, with all eyes on him, there’s no pretending otherwise. Jester starts cackling, and Veth’s eyebrows shoot all the way up her forehead. "Shut up," Caleb mutters, even as he’s reddening. Molly smirks, looking smug as anything. "Mollymauk, ja. Jester, I would not ask that of you-"

"Even if I wanted to?" Jester interrupts.

Caleb turns his gaze on her. "Would… Would you want to?"

"Mmmmaybe," she says coyly. "It’s not my turn yet."

Caleb huffs a little and continues. "Fjord, ja. Though I do not know if I would have the requisite self-control, if under the influence."

Fjord looks befuddled for a moment. Beau figures it out and starts cackling, just a moment before Fjord says, "Wait, are you assuming I’m a bottom?!"

"Ah - am I wrong?" Fjord says absolutely nothing to that, so Caleb continues, a quirk of mischief at the corner of his mouth. "Veth the Brave, ja, of course. Caduceus and Yasha, I do not think I am to either of your tastes, so, nein."

"You’re quite handsome," Jester protests.

"Thank you," Caleb says dryly, "but I do not think either of them is attracted to men."

"I’d… Do that for you, if you were going to die otherwise, and nobody else could," says Yasha, who sounds like she’s trying very hard not to sound repulsed.

"I appreciate the offer," says Caleb. "Let us hope it does not come to that. Jester?"

"Oh," says Jester, "well, you know… I’d pick Yasha!"

"Huh?" Yasha looks extremely surprised. "Me?"

"Yes, I think you’d be a gentle lover," Jester tells her. "And you’re very beautiful."

"Oh… Thank you, I think. I try." Yasha smiles at her. "Though it has been a while."

Beau’s pretty sure Jester hasn’t had sex, like, ever, and it would kind of suck if her first time weren’t really by choice, so she doesn’t push for any more of an answer than that. (She stamps down a bit of rising jealousy by reassuring herself that, if Jester’s looking for someone gentle, Beau isn’t exactly it anyway.) "Cap’n?"

"Jesus, alright. Was kinda hopin’ we’d have forgotten about this by the time it got to me. But if it does come down to it." Fjord puts his drink down, points around the table. "Beau, no. Molly, yeah, don’t get cocky about it." ("Too late," says Molly immediately, which Fjord ignores.) "Caleb, sure, if you think you could _handle_ it. Jester, nope, cause you just said not me and I’m not arguing with that. Veth, yup."

 _"What,"_ says Veth.

"You heard me," Fjord tells her, and winks, which, kind of stealing Beau’s thunder there, but, whatever. "Cad and Yasha, no, same reasons as Caleb. You’re up, Brenatto."

Veth looks - well, like someone who’s just realized that four of her friends and counting have all just told her they’d sleep with her. "Uh. Um. Well, Yeza would be, um, my first choice, obviously…"

Beau props her elbows on the table and her chin on her hands, gives Veth her best lidded-eyed smoulder. "Would you bang me, Veth?"

 _"Yes,"_ Veth blurts out, "yeah, anyone at this table, ‘cept Jester and Caduceus, cause they wouldn’t want to, are you _happy?!"_

She’s flushing darker by the minute. Mollymauk, Beau’s favorite person, leans forward and gives her an absolutely filthy smirk. "Is that so, darling?"

Veth splutters, and then Fjord is chiming in with a "well, well, well" and Caleb says "ja, you need only ask" and there’s even a quiet "Thank you, Veth," from Yasha. While Veth slides down lower and lower in her chair, Beau grins and then turns to the next person up. "Deuces?" Though she’s pretty sure she knows what he’s going to say.

Sure enough: "Just let me die," says Caduceus frankly. Jester chokes on her drink and then starts giggling. Caduceus smiles at her. "I mean it, though. I don't even know if it'd work on me, but if it did, just put me in a room alone somewhere and let me heal myself up. I don't want any of you guys getting your goo on me."

"Fair," Beau agrees, and turns to the last person at the table. _Be normal be normal be normal,_ she chants to herself.

"Oh… I guess it’s me, isn’t it," Yasha blinks. "Um… I don’t, ah, like dicks. But… I suppose I would let any of you touch me. Um, like Mollymauk said… I wouldn't want to be alone."

That really sounds like an _everyone_ response to Beau. She tries very hard not to think too much about it.

A moment lapses, and then, "Huh," says Fjord. "That was a lot of yesses in there."

"We’re all pretty fucking hot," Beau tells him.

"This is some of the weirdest flirting I’ve ever seen," says Caduceus serenely, and then the tension around the table is broken, and Beau is protesting that she’d only sleep with, like, half the party, and Jester is going to get another glass of milk, and the subject is, mostly, forgotten.

* * *

So, really, it's probably a good thing that Yasha and Molly are the ones who get hit, when it does happen.

They’ve found a small clearing well away from the pollen, spread out their bedrolls in the midday sun. Fjord barely has time to instruct the two clerics away - nobody has 100gp worth of diamond dust for greater restorations on hand, and their ship is an hour away on the shore, and Jester and Caduceus of all people _really shouldn’t be here right now_ \- before Yasha is pulling off her clothes frantically, Mollymauk tackling Caleb to the ground.

Now, Beau is deeply occupied between Yasha’s legs. Yasha is _huge,_ great oak-trunk thighs and a dusting of hair over her stomach and biceps bigger than Beau’s head, and Beau knows she wasn’t the one who got pollened but she _sure fucking feels like it._ Above her head, Yasha is moaning softly - softly enough that, honestly, Beau would be wondering if the pollen were indeed that strong if she couldn’t feel Yasha’s thighs trembling around her shoulders and her slick soaking Beau’s chin and her lips so swollen they feel _puffy_ as they pulse under Beau’s lips.

She thinks Yasha might have come already. She thinks Yasha might’ve come multiple times already. Yasha didn’t ask her to stop, and Beau was not at all inclined to.

It’s _hot_ in this jungle. Beau is gleaming with their mingled sweat and Yasha’s slick. She hooks one arm under Yasha’s thigh, to prop her up and hold her closer. With her other hand, she sinks two fingers into Yasha, thrusting in steady rhythm and crooking up the tips of her fingers to make Yasha cry out.

Beau thinks she could probably die right here and be happy with it.

Above her, Yasha’s practically cuddled up with their friends as Beau eats her out. The rest of the party, save for the clerics, is entangled next to them - Veth’s on her back, head turned to moan softly into Yasha’s shoulder, and Molly’s on all fours with his face in her crotch and Caleb is bent low over Molly’s back. Fjord is sitting on Molly’s other side, rubbing his back slowly with one hand, working the other down between his legs. He’s murmuring something soothing that Beau can’t quite make out.

Beau listens with half an ear, marks out Caleb’s soft, stuttered <i>oh</i> as he comes, Veth’s whimpered _ahhhh, ahhhh_ as she does the same. She’s vaguely aware of the slick noise when, presumably, Caleb pulls out, and of the distressed whine that follows. "More, please," Molly gasps, _"please, fuck me, I-"_

"I’ve got you," comes Fjord’s voice. "Hey, hey, I’ve got you-" and then Molly’s cries of renewed ecstasy mingle with Fjord’s low grunts and Yasha’s helpless sounds of pleasure.

There’s a sudden hitch of surprise in Yasha’s voice. Abruptly, her noises kick up half an octave. Beau comes up for air for a moment, curious. Veth has rolled half-onto Yasha and is playing with her nipples, rolling them between her fingers, tugging and twisting gently. Yasha has fucking huge areolas and Veth’s hands are _tiny,_ so it’s taking a lot. Beau keeps fingerfucking her, fascinated by the sight.

Next to Yasha, Fjord is shuddering and pressed down to the ground, shoulder bumping up against Veth’s legs. Molly’s practically collapsed over his back as he ruts into him. Caleb, who has pulled his pants back on, is sitting near Yasha’s head. He nods down to Beau. "As you were."

"Sure," says Beau, who had never really wanted to talk to Caleb mid-sex and would be happy if this were the last time. Caleb lifts Yasha’s head and rests it on his thigh, carefully away from his crotch. Beau squints, but it seems to be a comfort to Yasha, so she just dives back down again.

Beau is actually not very good at telling when girls come. She mostly just keeps going until they push her head away with that gasped-out _enough, enough_ that’s honestly one of her favorite sounds in the world. Caleb, apparently, has more of an eye for when Yasha’s done. After a while, he taps Beau’s shoulder twice, and Yasha makes an exhausted sigh of relief when Beau eases off.

She seems to be coming down from the pollen now, thank fuck. Beau’s strong, but her wrist can only take so much.

Not that she wouldn’t - even, you know, outside of a fuck-or-die situation - uh - like, after maybe a few hours to recover her wrist strength - er - anyway.

Somewhere in there, Molly had satisfied himself. There are a lot of marks on Fjord’s shoulders that weren’t there before. Beau wipes her hand on her pants, scoots up to rest her cheek on Yasha’s stomach. Veth is sprawled over her chest. Molly, once he pulls out from Fjord, tucks himself right into Yasha’s side, nuzzling at her shoulder. Fjord throws his arm over Molly’s waist to spoon him, and Caleb curls up on his side around Yasha’s head, stretching out an arm to stroke Fjord’s hair.

Everyone around her is curled up and breathing heavy, skin pressed on skin pressed on skin as the sun beats down above.

Beau breaks the silence when she can’t stand it anymore, because apparently she’s the only one agonizing over this, which might have something to do with her also being the only one who hasn’t had an orgasm in the last fifteen minutes, but, whatever. "Is this - okay?"

"Uh, I’m feelin’ fine," Fjord replies, and there are general sounds of agreement.

"I’m exhausted," Molly groans, "but alright, emotionally."

"It’s good we talked about it," Veth mumbles.

They _did_ talk about it, Beau reminds herself, and that lets her relax into the softness of Yasha’s stomach.

Fjord is pretty close. Beau suddenly places a scent that’s been bothering her, and wrinkles her nose. "Axe deodorant."

"Yup."


End file.
